Tuesday, March 15, 2016

I Don't Need No Reward Stickers

I still don't understand the double negative.  Do people mentally strike both negatives? Or do they accept the first one and take the second one as a note of passion (aka crazy)?  I love passion.  I'm passionate about passion.  When I hear someone use a double negative I'm always like "Preach!"  But when I use the word "always" I usually mean "one time or possibly less".

Daisy was proud of her reward sticker artwork.  They were quite cute stickers.  The arrangement keeps my interest.  Nicely done, little lass.

If I had a reward sticker chart I would have put a bunch of stickers on it and then later when the guilt hit I actually didn't do anything I would have to try to peel them off and I'd be stuck with a wilted, torn up piece of paper.  In other words, I'm not accomplishing goals I've set out for myself.  And I don't know how much I care.  I started taking anxiety medication at the beginning of the year and I can't figure out if it's good or bad. I wouldn't say I'm apathetic but the cons don't bother me because my anxiety that would tell me to care is quiet.  Too quiet...  Which is tough when anxiety was the only motivator I've had for along time.  I think I just need time to readjust.  Perhaps my values aren't quite what I thought they were.  That's okay.  I'll figure it out.  In the meantime I'll sleep a little more, daydream a little more.  ALTHOUGH...On my drive to the library I started on a thought process of living without arms and it made me cry.  I need to be more careful.  I can't just start showing up at things sobbing and then try to explain that I feel so bad for people who don't have arms.  I know if I did that someone without arms would show up out of nowhere and just slap me.

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